At the beginning of the relationship, narcissists are charming and charismatic. They shower their partners with lots of affection, gifts, and compliments, but, as soon as their partners commit, things dramatically change. Living with a narcissist is a nightmare, but breaking up with them is even worse.

If they don’t want you to leave they will do everything in their power to make you stay, promising that things will change. Their efforts to keep you under their control will turn your life into a living hell.

If you decide to break up and leave, here is what to expect:

They will seek your attention

Breaking up with a narcissist can result in numerous attention-grabbing behaviors, for example, plenty of messages a day, late-night calls, entering your house, and so on. It could be worse if you have children together since they will use your children to get what they want.

They promise to change

They promise to change when they realize persuasion no longer works. They will appear to be taking responsibility for their actions, promising to do everything you ask. They may seem like they finally understood what was wrong and now are ready to make things work.

This may build hope in you again, especially if you love them, but actually, it’s a trap they use to take you under their control. If you agree to get back together, things may get better at the beginning, but as soon as the narcissist gets comfortable, they will go back to their arrogant and self-centered behavior.

The smear campaign

If you are married, they will do everything to hurt you and blamed you. They may bring you in front of the judge in the courtroom and point you as the black sheep, just to make everyone know what a “monster” you are.

They may stalk you

Be ready for constant, unexpected meetings with them. They will appear out of nowhere to places where you regularly visit and will change their schedules so they can meet you everywhere you go.

They will get needy

Narcissists may seem independent and strong, but actually, they are tremendously needy. You may get hundreds of calls to come to fix their car, do some accounts for their business, or come down to walk the dog you have bought together.

In such circumstances, it may be difficult for you to say no, and you will find yourself getting pulled back.

Here are some tips on how to leave them without being hurt:

– Don’t give them another chance
– Don’t let them know you are leaving
– Make a copy of all your documents
– Ensure you have a spare cash
– Log out of everything and check your devices for trackers
– Don’t trust their words
– Reconnect with your friends and family
– Don’t just leave, but stay away!